I didn't want to have to do this, but I'm afraid you've left me with no choice. Don't wince-- this isn't going to be like the old days. I'm not going to yell at you, or pick on you, or tell you you're worthless. I just want to talk. Because I care about you. You are, in fact, all I've got.
What's been going on this past week? I mean, I know, obviously, but let's talk about it. You've been making such amazing progress. I mean, for God's sake... you've lost 58.8 pounds! That's so close to 60 and a new badge that you can TASTE it. And that's 25% of your starting body weight. You've quartered yourself! Imagine it! And you only have 24.2 more pounds to go! You've gone from a size 22/24 to size 14 shirt, and size 20 to size 12 jeans in less than a year! That's such awesome progress!
And don't even get me started on March! 10 pounds in a month? You've never accomplished something like that in your whole life! You'd been complacent throughout winter, but then you decided that damnit, you wanted to be below 180. So you did it. You just buckled down, figured out what it took, and did it--every single day. And in the meantime, you made yourself a serious runner. All those false starts leading up to now were just that. Look at you-- you're running 30 minutes at a time! Being healthy and able to do that is just as great as losing the weight.
So what's the trouble nowadays? Why are you losing steam? I know... you're getting complacent. I've seen you... you get undressed to get in the shower, but first you look in the mirror, appraising. "I look so much better than before," you tell yourself, sucking in your stomach. You admire your new collarbones and sexier neck appreciatively. You study the flat parts of your stomach and smile. You turn around and arch your neck to see how much perkier your little butt is. I've seen it!
And you're right-- you do look worlds better! But when we started this you told me you wanted to be thin, and while you're getting a lot closer, you're not quite there yet. But more importantly... you want to be healthy, right? You want to eat like a normal person, for nutrients, but not comfort eat. You want to be a busy, happy person who derives pleasure from lots of productive hobbies and outlets OTHER than food. Well, you're getting there. During March, when you were fighting to lose those ten pounds, you really WERE that person, 98% of the time. But lately, you've fallen back into those old habits. Lately, you've seemed to want to immediate gratification of the ice cream cone more than the satisfied feeling of the three vegetables before you get into bed.
Don't get me wrong--I know you've made progress, and I'm really really proud of you for that. You used to eat until you were stuffed at every single meal, I remember. You used to drink about two liters of soda every day, and inhale junk food so mindlessly that you didn't even taste it. Nowadays, you wouldn't dream of any of that. But we know you--it's easier for you to give something up completely than to try to do it just a little. You're not good at snacking just a little, so work with yourself. Go back to no unhealthy snacking all day until JUST before you climb into bed, then brush your teeth right away. That was working well for you, and you still get your snack. Stop letting that temptation to skip a meal get to you--you know you just end up over-eating or eating poorly later to compensate. Don't slack off on packing your healthy snacks... those are what fills you up and stops you from messing up during the day.
But at night... Gosh. What are we going to do about the evenings? Where is all of this snacking time coming from? Part of it, I think, is that you started going to the gym in the mornings rather than at night on your non-C25k days, giving you too much free time. Go back to after-school workouts. You don't need the morning workout to keep you honest at school--you do a good job of staying good during that time anyway. You need that workout right after school, when the temptation to eat two ice cream cones is greatest. :)
Alright... let's go ahead and get it out. The emotional stuff. I know, you got scared. The scale stopped moving for a week or two, and you thought it was all over. It had all seemed so easy, ~too~ easy, and then suddenly that little gain pulled the rug out from under you. Suddenly you thought the system had broken down. So what did you do? You started eating. You sabotaged yourself. You made SURE there'd be a gain the next week too. But at least you KNEW why you gained that next week. Well... you sort of knew, right? You kinda remembered all those ice creams cones, all that chocolate. But where was the long term happiness those things had promised to bring? Oh that's right... there wasn't any. So all you had to show for the week was a gain on the scale, a queasy feeling in your stomach, and crushing disappointment. It sucked, huh?
But do you want to hear the good news? Here it is: It's over. You can start over tomorrow. You can stop gaining. You can see another loss on the scale seven days from now. Remember the quote: Do it now. You become successful the moment you start moving toward a worthwhile goal. All you've got to do is get back on track. Get back in that healthy headspace. Eat the right stuff, in the right proportions. That's all it takes. I know, I know... it all seems so insurmountable when there's something else on your mind. When you're feeling down, the New Healthy Lifestyle is the last thing you care about, right? But you DO care about it. You WANT to be thin. You DON'T want to be controlled by food anymore.
Remember that, okay? Because I care about you, and I hate seeing you unhappy. I know you know all the right things to do, and you can do them. So don't give up! You haven't failed. You've stumbled a bit, but you can get right back up and keep moving forward. 'Cause you know what? You're almost there.
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